It IS Possible: Fat, Unattractive Girls In Medellin Colombia

The other night I went to a club in Medellin.

I’m not going to tell you where exactly I went because it’s not important.

But here’s what happened…

After I went inside this club and looked around for a few minutes, I suddenly realized I had come upon a very rare sight– a large infiltration of fat, unattractive girls.

This is in Medellin, Colombia.

At first, I didn’t think my brain was registering the situation properly…

After all, I was the one who wrote about being under the Medellin spell.

I was the one who listed girls as a primary reason for returning to Medellin.

I was the one who never failed to play up the beauty of the paisa girls to anyone who asked about Medellin.

And most of all, I was the one who just wrote about how I’m looking to go deeper with this city.

But here it was… The exact opposite of everything I’ve come to expect.

Instinctively, I shook my head a few times and slapped myself on the temple and tried to focus my eyes again. I thought, “This can’t actually be real, can it?”

Oh yes. It was real.

The place was full of female corpulence.

It was an oasis of bloated stomachs and rolls of fat.

It was a den of fleshy, unattractive females perched around their tables like engorged turkeys.

And listen, when I say “fat”, I’m not talking about the little Latin pudge that you see here and there– where the girl is still attractive even though she may be little overweight.

I’m talking about FAT women. FAAAAAAAT. F.A.T.

FAT.

And, I’m not just talking 2 or 3 fat girls in this club… I’m talking 80% of the girls in the club were like this.

I was dumbfounded. I couldn’t believe my eyes. I thought I had left obesity back in the US.

But it was true. This club had hordes of fat, unattractive women.

In fact, I made several laps around the club just to make sure I wasn’t kidding myself or seeing an illusion.

I wasn’t.

Somewhat ironically, the group I was out with had brought in the most attractive girls in the place– some foreign backpacker girls we met 2 hours earlier. Within minutes, the few Colombian men in the club approached the girls– they looked like thirsty men who finally found water in a desert.

I chuckled.

Despite being given the ‘approach me’ eye from a number of the gordas, I wasn’t interested in any of them (nor the backpacker girls), so after sipping a beer for 20 minutes, I left.

My experience that night confirmed several things:

First, lesser-known clubs are lesser-known clubs for a reason.

Second, there will be some girls who don’t take care of themselves in all parts of the world. You can only hope the percentage is relatively small.

Finally, things aren’t always guaranteed to be ideal, in this city or the next.

  • ?????????

    You should have gone to the well-known clubs, there are plenty of hot girls, with wonderful bodies and personality. Anyway, I don’t see why can’t fat women have fun.. Colombia hasn’t same obesity rates as US, but that doesn’t mean the problem is unusual and that there aren’t fat people. I have been too many times in Medellin and have run across the hottest women, I think you didn’t choose the right place for you, wish you more luck for the next time you go to Medellin! I have had excellent times in there. Regards, Aleksandr! (I’m sorry if my english isn’t too fluent)

    • Thanks Aleksandr! I too have had great times in Medellin… it’s just that night was a little different. 🙂

  • I honestly was 90% certain there was going to be a punchline towards the end and that it would be “And then I heard them talking….in English! They were American!” [or British, they have nearly as much of a problem with this as we do].

    Cheers,
    Andrew

    • blurredmongoose

      Or Aussies, Kiwis, or Canucks! Funnily enough, according to the latest OECD report, they (and the Yanks, of course) are all ahead of us Brits in obesity rates. Not that it’s something to be proud of. Being one of the leaner countries in the developed Anglophone world is still, sadly, pretty damn fat. :/

      • Yeah, but even beyond the official numbers is just the experience on the ground. The longer I spend outside the US, the more I am totally dumbstruck when I return at how large people can actually get.

    • Haha, I wish! That would have been a great punchline indeed, you’ve given me an idea for later posts. 😉

  • Well, there are fat people all across the world, this post isn’t as intellectual as the others I’ve read so far. Of course you will see fat people, its just America it’s more common… duh ?

    • “Of course you will see fat people.” No, not a lot of them, particularly in the better clubs in Medellin… The contrast was between what I normally expect to see on a night out in Medellin versus what I (shockingly) saw that night.

      • Hahahahaha ahhhhhhh bueno bueno ya veo! Que chevere! I understand what you were saying though Ryan. It’s ridiculous in the states! I just finished watching this presidential debate…. wild! 😉

  • Maybe it was like a ladies night…only, a horrible one. Where this was isn’t irrelevant at all, I’ll be in medellin within about 2 weeks and I’d be more than happy to avoid this location all together!

    • I’ll give you a hint… it was on la 70. Stay far, far away! lol

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